What did the mayonnaise say when the refrigerator was opened?

Close that damn door! Can't you see I'm dressing??"

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Open Jokes More Open Jokes

How many babies does it take to open a door?

Depends how hard you throw them.

Why couldn't the man open a fish and herb shop?

Because he didn't have the thyme or the plaice.

Mayonnaise Jokes More Mayonnaise Jokes

What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise?

Lmayo!

Why do rednecks always smell like pickles, mayonnaise, and ham?

Because they're inbred.