Why did the one eyed banker lose his job?

He didn't have any debtperception.

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How did Jesus lose his virginity?

When he was nailed on the cross.

What's the most important meal of the day to help you lose pounds?

Brexit

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Why did all the Black people move to Detroit?

Because they heard there were no jobs there.

What do you call a Private Investigator who is bad at his job?

A Defective!