How many rationalists does it take to change a lightbulb?

Probably one but you can't generalise.

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How many teachers does it take to change a lightbulb?

None, that's what students are for.

How many Astros fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Both of them.

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How many believable competent "just right for the job" presidential candidates does it take to change a lightbulb ?

It's going to be a dark 4 years isn't it

What do you get when you cross a Rat and a Mountain Climber?

Nothing, you can't cross a vector by a scalar. EDIT: changed multiply to cross.