What did the pirate say when he was accepted into flight school?

It's a pilot's life for me!

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Why do pirates have trouble walking?

Arrrr-thritis

What did the pirate say with the steering wheel in his pants?

Arrgh, it's driving me nuts!

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Why did the fish not get accepted into college?

His grades were below sea level

What's the difference between a woman and a PC from 1995?

A woman doesn't accept 3 1/2 inch floppies.