What do authors do when they are being chased?

They make like Dr. Jekyll and Hyde!

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Chase Jokes More Chase Jokes

What's the fastest animal in the world?

A chicken crossing Ethiopia. What's the second fastest animal ... The ethiopian chasing it.

Which is better exercise, chasing a car or running away from one?

Chasing a car. After running from a car you'll just be tired, but after chasing one you'll be exhausted.

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What did the author tell his publisher when he handed him a 600 pages instead of the 200 the publisher had asked for?

Sorry, I overwrote your order. :-)

What does an author have after they get abdominal surgery?

A semi-colon