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Polled pork.
Because they drown at their own wealth Edit: I got down voted :( I thought of that in my head and just wanted to share it
Lock them both in the trunk of the car for an hour, then open it up and see which one of them is happier to see you.
Because he kept locking up.
Deserting your dessert in the desert. I feel some banana jokes about to be inserted in this thread tho
To the morgue.