Whats the most handiest tool ever?

A Hand!

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Whats the best thing about dating a Cleveland Cavaliers fan?

They never expect a ring

Whats the age of consent in Thailand?

50$

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Why did the man with one hand cross the road?

To get to the second-hand shop. I'll show myself out.

What u doing later?

Wife: That's not what I meant by pick up my towel. Just hand it to me, idiot.