Why do Retirees smile all the time?

Because they can't hear a word you're saying!

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Hear Jokes More Hear Jokes

What do you call a huge ugly slobbering furry monster with cotton wool in his ears?

Anything you like he can't hear you.

Why are highly successful people named Mark always so depressed?

Because they can't stop hitting themselves. This joke came to me while I was half asleep this morning. I'm not sure how original it is. I probably heard some variation of it somewhere and have just forgotten. Any suggestions for improving it?

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Why are ghosts always just moaning?

Did your manners die too Use your words!

How many amateur masochists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Only one; But it takes a WHOLE E.R. room to extract it afterwards. Double joke! "whole... hole." it's a play on words ;)

Smile Jokes More Smile Jokes

Why is the lady on the Red Heads matchbox always smiling?

There are 48 heads in her box - of course shes happy!

Why don't French people smile in pictures?

The French word for "cheese" is "fromage".