How do you know when someone smokes weed?

Dont worry, they'll tell you.

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Know Jokes More Know Jokes

How'd you sleep?

Him: *texts* Horrible...I was tossing and turn- Me: *crawls out from under his bed* I KNOW, YOU POOR THING.

What did David Crockett say when he looked over the Alamo wall and saw 3000 Mexicans?

Hey I didn't know we were pouring concrete today.

Smoke Jokes More Smoke Jokes

What is it called when Michael J. Fox smokes a joint?

Shake N' Bake.

Why shouldn't ISIS be destroying ancient Mesopotamian buildings?

Because it's frowned upon in Islam to smoke ziggurats.

Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

How does one know a man is going to say something smart?

His senentences start with "A woman once told me.."

What do you call an elephant with a poor memory?

A bold and innovative departure from the hackneyed stereotypes that all too often dominate the joke-telling industry.

Worry Jokes More Worry Jokes

How can you tell someone hates vegans, cross fitters, and atheists?

Don't worry, they'll repost a joke about it.

What did the plate say to the fork?

Don't worry, the dinner's on me.

Weed Jokes More Weed Jokes

What do you call a gorilla who magically smokes weed?

Hairy Potter.

Why did the police arrest the sidewalk sidewalk?

It always had some sort of weed on it!