What did celery say when he broke up with his girlfriend?

She wasn't right for me, so I really don't carrot all.

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Break Jokes More Break Jokes

Which global disasters happen when you drop a roast turkey?

The downfall of Turkey, the break-up of China, and the overthrow of Greece.

What do ya call a bunch of guys breaking into a music store and helping themselves to the stringed instruments?

A: Luters.

Girlfriend Jokes More Girlfriend Jokes

What do you call your ex-girlfriend in Maryland?

Old bae.

What did the astronaut say to his girlfriend when he broke up with her?

I need some space.

Carrot Jokes More Carrot Jokes

What is worse than a carrot that smells like a snow women?

One that smells like a snow man.

What kinds of vegetables did Ghandi prefer?

Peace and carrots... Thought this up at work today. I'm sure it's been done before but it made me chuckle...

Celery Jokes More Celery Jokes

What did the bunny ask his boss for?

A raise in *celery*.

Who's there ! Celery ! Celery who ?

Celery me you lunch will you I'm hungry !