What do mathematicians think about exponential functions?

They're radical.

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Why did the inventor of panadol think I had no parents?

I said I'm an orphan.

Why do you think I spend too much time at my computer?

Well dear... Every time I ask you to close the windows you answer with "Please wait while your computer shuts down"...

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Why did the mathematician get an F on his English quiz?

He wrote, "i is the square root of negative 1."

What did the mathematician say after Thanksgiving dinner?

1)/8"