What do you call a deaf dinosaur?

Anything you like - he can't hear you.

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Why didn't the construction worker like to get wet?

Because he didn't drywall.

Why wouldn't Kurt Cobain let you charge your phone at his house?

the guy likes his power chords too much.

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What kind of disease do you get from birds?

Chirpes. It's a canarial disease, and I hear it's untweetable.

What's the last thing you want to hear while using a urinal?

nice watch"