What do you get when you hold two green balls tightly in your hand?

A leprachaun's undivided attention.

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

Why did the belt go to prison?

He held up a pair of pants!

Why are clouds like jockeys?

Because they hold the reins!

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How do you offend a vegan?

Cover your ears with your hands

What do you call it when a man has a beer in each hand?

Irish handcuffs.