What's the only thing an Irish person can hold on to?

A grudge.

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

What did the pirate tell his littler sister when she asked if she could hold his parrot?

ISIS

Why did the footballer hold his boot to his ear?

Because he liked sole music!

Thing Jokes More Thing Jokes

Why can't you tell pun jokes to kleptomaniacs?

Because they always take things literally

What kind of snake is good at building things?

A boa constructor.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What do you call a seven course Irish meal?

A 6-pack and a potato.

Why do the Irish only put 239 beans in the pot?

Because one more would be "two-fahrty"

Irish Person Jokes More Irish Person Jokes

How do you call it when an Irish person goes out for drinks?

A bargain

What do you call and Irish person who stays outside all night?

Paddy O'Furniture

Grudge Jokes More Grudge Jokes

What's the only thing an Irish person can hold on to?

A grudge.

What's black, blue, and red all over?

The Grudge at a rave.