What's the definition of "de javu"?

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What's the difference between mashed potatoes and pea soup?

You can mash potatoes, but you can't pee soup. (sorry sorry. Really. I've loved this joke since I was... oh.. six...)

Why should you never mention the number 288?

Because it's two gross! (A gross is a measurement unit for "144". So 2 * 144 = 288. Or "two gross".)

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What is the definition of a semicolon?

Something I usually have after a long night of drinking.

What is the definition of diplomacy?

The ability to tell a person to go to hell in such a way that they look forward to the trip.