What sound does a frog make while jacking off?

Rubbit Rubbit

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What sound did the slot machine make when the Chinese person won the jackpot?

Cha-chink!

What's small, orange and sounds like a parrot?

An oompa loompa with a sore throat.

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Why was the Jack-o-Lantern afraid to cross the road?

He had no guts!

What did the guy say after he finished jacking off?

Well that got a load off my mind.