What town should a "mountain oyster" festival be held in?

Oxnard, CA

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Hold Jokes More Hold Jokes

Why did Stephen get an A on his test?

He held his teacher at gunpoint and forced her to give him a good grade despite the fact he got an F.

Why couldn't the glue hold the walls together?

Because it wasn't ceiling.

Town Jokes More Town Jokes

What do you call it when all the Chinese places in town start to close?

Wonton endangerment.

How can you ever be late for anything in London?

They have a huge clock right in the middle of the town.