Why can't you trust anything MATTER says?

Because it makes up everything.

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Trust Jokes More Trust Jokes

Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

How Do they say "F**k You" in Hollywood?

Trust Me..."

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

What should I wear?

Mr. Salad asks. She replies, "It doesn't matter to me, just be well dressed."

What did the astrophysicist say to the quark?

You matter.