Why didn't the conspiracy theorist make his irreverently named pet sleep outside?

Because 9/11 was an inside dog.

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Who's rhere?

9/11. 9/11 Who You said you would never forget.

What happened to the number 10?

It got stuck in 9/11

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How do conspiracy theorists like their lovers?

Illumi-naughty

Why do conspiracy theorists have such long beards?

Because they don't know how to use Occam's razor