How do you break a Pollock's finger?

Punch him in the nose.

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What did Jonathan Ross say after breaking in to a large kitchen to steal some utensils?

It was worth the whisk

Why did Mary Poppins break both her legs?

because she had Supercalifrajilistic Osteoporosis

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What is Chris Brown's favorite drink?

Punch!

What's the difference between a Mexican and a computer?

You only have to punch the information into a computer once.

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What's orange and sounds like a carrot!!!????

A snowman blowing his nose!!!!!!!!

Who won the animal race?

The giraffe and the aardvark were running neck and neck but the aardvark won by a nose!