How do you make an Italian deaf?

Tie their hands behind their back.

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Italian Jokes More Italian Jokes

What do you get when you cross an Italian with a gorilla?

A retarded gorilla.

Why did the Italian boy want to grow a mustache?

A: So he could look like his mama.

Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

Why did Helen Keller mastutbate with one hand?

So she could moan with the other.

Why should you never trust a one armed philosophy professor?

He never mentions "on the other hand"

Tie Jokes More Tie Jokes

Did you hear about the two silk worms in a race?

It ended in a tie.

How about some snappy one-liners?

Ironically, the only way you could get me to watch 50 shades of gray is if you tied me up and forced me to watch it.