How do you stop your laptop batteries from running out?

Hide their trainers.

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Stop Jokes More Stop Jokes

How will you escape?

Dude: It's very simple, I will stop my imagination

What should you do if you get an erection on the subway?

Get off at the next stop!

Hide Jokes More Hide Jokes

What abs?

Me: "The abs hiding under this protective layer of you're grounded."

What was in those drums of chemicals Captain Malcolm Reynolds hid behind in Firefly?

For-Mal-To-Hide.

Run Jokes More Run Jokes

What do you call tree sap that won't stop running?

Forest gunk.

Why doesn't Mexico have any good athletes?

Because anybody who can run, jump, and swim is already in America

Trainer Jokes More Trainer Jokes

What can you say to your trainer that will compliment then on your progress and also be wildly inappropriate?

You make me hard

What's the best machine I can use?

The trainer responds, "The ATM"