What did the cactus say to his wife?

Aloe Vera!

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

What's the one thing you don't want to hear when fighting with your wife on a long road trip?

Recalculating route.

How do you get a kid out from a microwave?

Please answer before my wife gets home!

Cactus Jokes More Cactus Jokes

What's the difference between a cactus and a schoolbus?

Cactus has little pricks on the outside

What do you call a human that's now a cactus?

A transplant.