What do you call a snake that likes history?

A HISSStorian.

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What does a fisherman say when he catches a fish?

His catch-phrase. Short n' Sweet, hope you like it!

What do you call a guy who likes to lose?

Ewan

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What do snakes use to build clocks?

Metal Gears

What kind of snake is good at math?

A: An adder.

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Why aren't you doing very well in history?

Because the teacher keeps asking about things that happened before I was born!

Why were the early days of history called the Dark Ages?

There were many knights.