What does Garry Newman want to be when he grows up?

Garry Oldman.

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Why are pilots so honest?

Keep those maintenance issues quiet. I want lies, frankly. "We're delayed because we're winning a safety award."

Why did Julius Caesar buy crayons ?

He wanted Mark Antony !

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What do you plant ... What do you plant, to grow a really big plant that has nothing wrong with it?

Dyslexic acorns. They grow into A-ok trees.

What did the creepy scientist say to his new creepy wife?

Let's grow MOLD together!