What does the mayonnaise say to the refrigerator?

Shut the door im dressing

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How do you suffocate a redneck?

Tape his mouth shut.

How do you tell a deaf person to shut up?

Here, hold this."

Mayonnaise Jokes More Mayonnaise Jokes

What do you get when you combine mayonnaise and bologne?

Bolognese sauce

What did Shawn like most about his trip to Paris?

He said it was lovely to hear the French pheasants singing the Mayonnaise."