What gets longer the more you cut it at both ends?

A ditch.

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End Jokes More End Jokes

What is printed on the bottom of a bottle in Michigan?

Found on /r/linux) A: Open the other end

What did Miss Piggy say to Kermit at the end of their first date?

Nothing. She had a frog in her throat.

Cut Jokes More Cut Jokes

Whats long and black and hard to cut into?

The line at KFC

Who wears robes, cuts off people's hands, and lives in the desert?

Obi-Wan Kenobi.

Ditch Jokes More Ditch Jokes

What's it called when Batman ditches church?

Christian bail.

Why did the blonde drive into the ditch?

A: To turn the blinker off.