What's the second hardest thing in the morning?

Getting out of the bed!

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Bed Jokes More Bed Jokes

What does Green Day say before bed?

Green night

What's the worst thing a girl can wear to bed?

A condom

Second Jokes More Second Jokes

What's grey and wrinkly and jumps every twenty seconds ?

An elephant with hiccups !

Why did the one-handed man cross the road?

A: To get to the second hand shop.

Morning Jokes More Morning Jokes

Why do women have trouble peeing in the morning?

You ever tried to open a grilled cheese sandwich

What would be different if men got pregnant?

Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay and morning sickness would rank as the nation's #1 health problem.