What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

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Look Jokes More Look Jokes

What did the stop light say to the car?

Don't look I am changing

Why could Luke and Leia never be together?

They went looking for love in Alderaan places.

Like Jokes More Like Jokes

What are the blonde's first words after 4 years of college?

A: "Would you like fries with that "

What Do People Have In Common With Jellybeans?

Nobody likes the black ones.

Today Jokes More Today Jokes

How many sad soccer fans are there today?

A Brazillion...

What do you want to work on today?

Well we did neck day yesterday, and the day before. "So...neck day again" You bet

Cancel Jokes More Cancel Jokes

Why was the feminist picnic cancelled?

because nobody made sandwiches

What do they call aborted fetuses in Prague?

Cancelled Czechs.

Barber Jokes More Barber Jokes

When the barber is done cutting his hair, the cowboy goes back outside. And guess what?

Pony gone.

What did the barber say to the Potato?

You've got eyes on the back of your head!"

Carol Jokes More Carol Jokes

What would you like today?

Me: Make me look attractive. Barber: CAROL! CANCEL ALL MY APPOINTMENTS!

What do crack addicts sing while caroling?

All I Want for Christmas is my two front teeth!