Why did the child have two black eyes?

Because telling them once wasn't enough.

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Tell Jokes More Tell Jokes

What signal tells you that a politician is lying?

The lips are moving

How do you read the Gospel According to Shrek?

Open your bible to Psalm BODY ONCE TOLD ME

Child Jokes More Child Jokes

What is your sin, child?

My husband and I are arguing That's very common. ...about my boyfriend.

What did the children with no arms and legs get for Christmas?

Cancer

Black Eye Jokes More Black Eye Jokes

What do you tell a women with a black eye?

Nothing, you already told her once.

What do you tell your wife with two black eyes?

Nothing, you already told her twice.