Why did the Irish man never get caught drink driving?

Because he never left the pub.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

Why do we have to listen to a 45 second instructional to leave someone a voice mail?

Beep, talk. We get it, condescending cell companies.

What's the difference between foreplay and KFC?

Once you're finished with the breasts and thighs, you're left with a greasy box to put your bone in.

Catch Jokes More Catch Jokes

How do you catch a squirrel?

Climb a tree and act like a nut.

How did Pinocchio realize he was made of wood?

His hand caught on fire.

Irish Jokes More Irish Jokes

What would Apple laptops be called if Steve Jobs had been Irish?

McBook Eyre

What do you call an Irish basketball player with a sore back?

Hunch-black of Notre Dame

Pub Jokes More Pub Jokes

Why would Bart Simpson never go to a pub?

Because there's a BartEnder there.

What did the Irishman text his Wife?

Honey I'm down at the pub having a pint with the lads. Be home in about 30 min. If I'm not back by then please read this message again."

Irish Man Jokes More Irish Man Jokes

What did the Irish man and the mongol woman name their child?

Lepre Kahn

How many potatoes does it take to starve an Irish man?

None