Why did the marble countertop leave the kitchen?

It was tired of being taken for granite.

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Leave Jokes More Leave Jokes

How did the Idiot break his arm while raking leaves?

He fell out of the tree.

Why couldn't the man leave Moscow?

He was Snowden.

Granite Jokes More Granite Jokes

Why did the geologist quit his job?

His boss always took him for granite.

What is the best thing about Dwane "the rock" Johnson's physique?

Nobody takes him for granite.

Kitchen Jokes More Kitchen Jokes

How can you tell if a woman's picture is photoshopped?

She isn't standing in the kitchen

What can I get you to drink?

Pepsi" Is Peps- Uh one moment please In kitchen, to manager I don't know, he just said Pepsi. What do I do