Why doesn't San Antonio have a pro football team?

Because then Dallas would want one too.

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What would be a terrible name for a new beer?

Q: What would be a terrible name for a new beer A: "Mondays"...because no one would EVER want to buy a case of the Mondays...

Why did the IT guy want to be an astronaut?

So he can find router space.

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Where are people in Dallas staying to avoid getting Ebola?

The Cowboys Stadium. Because they can't catch anything there.

What's her favorite song?

I'm Going Through the Big D and Don't Mean Dallas