Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?

A: Because if they get lost it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

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Miss Jokes More Miss Jokes

How do you know when you are too drunk to drive?

When you swerve to miss a tree and then realise it was your air freshener..

What happens if Usain Bolt misses his bus?

He waits for it at the next stop.

Lose Jokes More Lose Jokes

Which is the worst hand to lose?

The second one.

What is the most inappropriate thing to say to someone who just lost their job?

You had one job.

Age Jokes More Age Jokes

What's the difference between an Arab and an American wife?

The age

What's white, plastic, and not suitable for ages 5 and under?

Michael Jackson

Violist Jokes More Violist Jokes

Why shouldn't violists take up mountaineering?

A: Because if they get lost it takes ages before anyone notices that they're missing.

Why don't violists get stressed?

Because they have nothing to fret about!

Notice Jokes More Notice Jokes

What was the first thing Hellen Keller noticed at the beach?

The volleyball net.

What did the chef say when he noticed his scales were broken?

No weigh...