How do you cut down a hipster tree?

A suuh dude!

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What's the difference between a saxophone and an onion?

You don't cry when you cut up a saxophone. Happy Saxophone Day Why this musical abomination deserves its own day is beyond me. Edit: beside to beyond

Why don't you buy drugs from an Emo?

Their stuff is always cut.

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What did the racist surfer say when asked about hanging a black man?

Hang ten dude!!

What are you planting???

B: The seed of doubt. A: Dude, that's the worst joke I've ever heard! A: Or is it the best???