How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat?

You use a spirit level.

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Use Jokes More Use Jokes

Which perfume do you use ?

It smells good. I want to buy one for my wife." Lady: "Please don't. Some idiot will have an excuse to talk to her."

What do Mexicans use with the Wii-U?

Amiigo

Lie Jokes More Lie Jokes

What body movements alert you that a politician is lying?

His lips are moving.

What do you get when you mix a dyslexic, an insomniac, and an agnostic?

Someone who lies awake at night wondering if there's a dog

Ghost Jokes More Ghost Jokes

Why do ghosts make the best thieves?

Because possession is 9/10 of the law

What do you call the sound a ghost makes when he calls you?

A phone moan.

Spirit Level Jokes More Spirit Level Jokes

How do Religious Education teachers mark exams?

With spirit levels.

How do you get a ghost to lie perfectly flat?

You use a spirit level.