How many ants does it take to rent a house?

Doesn't matter, ants can't rent a house

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House Jokes More House Jokes

What do Big Ben and the House of Commons have in common?

Both have a huge bellend swinging his weight around inside

Why do hurricanes have women name?

Because they take away your house, your car, your furniture and everything you have.

Ant Jokes More Ant Jokes

What did the aardvark say to Noah?

What do you mean you only brought two ants!

How many ants does it take to screw in a light bulb?

A light bulb weighs about 50g and a single ant can lift about .2g, so it takes somewhere around 250 ants working together.

Matter Jokes More Matter Jokes

Which end of a bus is it best to get off?

It doesn't matter. Both ends stop.

How many "friend zone" guys does it take to put in a light bulb?

It doesn't matter how many. They just compliment it and get mad when it won't screw. Edit: Credits to Drougen for making it better.

Rent Jokes More Rent Jokes

Why is housing cheaper as an orphan?

It's 'rent free!

How much is the rent for this amazing apartment?

Ma'am, this is the wine aisle of the grocery store.