How was the Roman Empire cut in two?

With a pair of Caesars.

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What's the difference between a Pizza and an onion?

No one cries when you cut up Pizza.

What do you call a Knight that cuts beef?

Sir Loin.

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What do you get when you stab a toddler with a pair of scissors?

An erection.

Where do you park Two Ships of Theseus?

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Roman Empire Jokes More Roman Empire Jokes

How was the Roman Empire cut in two?

With a pair of Caesars.

How do you cut the Roman Empire in half?

With a pair of Caesars!