What do you call 13 dwarves and a hobbit inside a mountain?

A *smaugasbord*.

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Mountain Jokes More Mountain Jokes

Why are the mountains in Switzerland called "the Alps"?

Because when people fall off of 'em, they yell AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLPPPP!!!!!!!!

What would a Scotsman call a mountain which is on the moon?

A moon-tain.

Hobbit Jokes More Hobbit Jokes

What was it called when the dragon from The Hobbit was thrown out a window?

The Defenestration of Smaug.

What do you call a pompous Hobbit?

Bilbo Braggins

13 Jokes More 13 Jokes

Why is the pH of a white girl either 9, 11 or 13?

1. She's basic. 2. She literally can't even.

How many skaters does it take to change a lightbulb?

One, but it will take 13 attempts.