What do you call a deaf person who can't lip read?

Anything you want!

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What do mechanical keyboards want for dinner?

Chicken ticka ticka ticka masala

What is the similarity between tight rope walking and an old lady giving you head?

You don't want to look down.

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Why do girls always get mad when I try to read their shirts?

It's not my fault I'm blind.

Why do they print nutritional information on Snickers bars?

If you don't know candy is bad for you, what are the chances you can read

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How do you shut up a deaf person?

Punch them in the hands.

What do you call a deaf person who can't lip read?

Anything you want!