What do you call a discounted Zuckerberg?

Marked down!

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What's ISIS' favorite kind of discount?

Blowouts

What do you call a discounted Zuckerberg?

Marked down!

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Why is your January report card so bad ?

Son: Well you know how it is. Things are always marked down after Christmas !

Who says Jesus couldn't perform miracles?

He managed to find mates named Matthew, Mark, Luke and John hanging around in the Middle East.