What do you call an Ape that's afraid of heights?

A chimp-pansy. This is my go to primatology joke.

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Height Jokes More Height Jokes

What is the volume of a disk with radius z and height a?

Pi * z * z * a

How can you tell if a cat is blonde?

A: No matter what height you drop it from it always lands on its head.

Ape Jokes More Ape Jokes

What do you get when you cross an ape with a calculator?

A Hairy Reasoner. (Andy Rooney used to enjoy this one)

Which author do the Gorillas love most?

Joh Steinbeck - who wrote 'The Apes of Wrath!'