What do you do when a bird attacks you?

Duck.

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Duck Jokes More Duck Jokes

What does a duck call a tractor?

A Quakter

What does the ducks in Cern say?

Quark Quark

Bird Jokes More Bird Jokes

What did the bird say after its cage fell apart?

Cheap cheap!

Why couldn't the lake birds get along?

Because they were SWAN enemies.

Attack Jokes More Attack Jokes

What do you call a french man who's been attacked by a bear?

Claude

How would you describe the woman who attacked you?

Describes mother* *Gets a copy of picture* *Gives it to mum as late birthday present*