What do you have when you have two small, green balls in your hand?

Kermit's undivided

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Hand Jokes More Hand Jokes

How is a judge like an English teacher?

They both hand out long sentences.

What mistake did the chronometer make while it was getting along well with the digital watch?

It asked the digital watch for its hand in marriage.

Kermit Jokes More Kermit Jokes

What do Harry Potter and Kermit the frog have in common?

Hogwarts!

What do Kermit The Frog'S fingers smell like?

Bacon.