What is a carpenters dream girl?

What is a carpenters dream girl? Flat as a board, skinny as a nail and easy to screw.

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Screw Jokes More Screw Jokes

What's the definition of divorce?

The screwing you get for the screwing you got!

How many Northern Californians does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Hella

Nail Jokes More Nail Jokes

Why can't Jesus play hockey?

He keeps getting NAILED TO THE BOARDS!...

What is a carpenters dream girl?

What is a carpenters dream girl? Flat as a board, skinny as a nail and easy to screw.

Board Jokes More Board Jokes

What did Goldberg say when he boarded the wrong train?

Auschittz."

What type of board will you be riding?

Jesus: looks at feet They're using boards