What is Italian-American foreplay?

Hey! Wake up and roll over!"

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Why did the chicken cross the road, roll in dirt and then cross the road again?

Because he was a dirty double crosser!

Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickle?

Because it had more cents

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Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?

It's ok, he woke up.

What's the hardest part about being a vegan?

Waking up at 5 am to milk the almonds.