What is WRONG with you?

Me: *slowly counting on fingers* let's see... ok... carry the 1... um... That would be everything

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Let Jokes More Let Jokes

Why is Mrs. Claus disappointed?

because Santa came early! I'll let myself out.

Whatever shall we do?

Let us spray!" replied the other.

1 Jokes More 1 Jokes

Why do Buddhists always buy 1 ply toilet paper?

Because they like to get in touch with their inner self.

What is a horses number 1 priority when voting?

A stable economy

Count Jokes More Count Jokes

How many NRA members does it take to stop a 6-year-old paraplegic from stealing a candy bar?

Nobody knows - they usually lose count at 800 rounds.

What makes the Palestinians tick?

Not counting the bombs strapped to their chests, I have no clue.

Carry Jokes More Carry Jokes

What do you call spaghetti that carries a fake ID?

an impasta!

Why does Axl Rose love to carry around The Scarlet Letter?

Because every Rose has its Hawthorne

Finger Jokes More Finger Jokes

What's the difference between your finger and a hammer?

I don't know! Well you're not using my computer keyboard then!

Why do bald men cut holes in their pockets?

So they can run their fingers through their hair.