What mammal dies after it mates?

Anyone that goes near my wife!

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Wife Jokes More Wife Jokes

Why do woman out live men?

They don't have wives

What about our child ?

Wife: What What child Husband: So you are not pregnant

Die Jokes More Die Jokes

Why are there no cats on Mars?

Because there is no oxygen and they'd die from UV radiation, you idiot.

What did the Japanese chef say when his mother died?

Well, that's the edamame.

Mate Jokes More Mate Jokes

Which phone is most sold in Australia?

The htc M8. Oi mate

Who did the sea captain lose his virginity to?

His first mate