What's Jared from Subway's favorite chord?

A flat minor

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What do you get when you push a piano down a mining shaft?

A flat minor.

What do you get when you drop a piano on a toddler?

A flat minor

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What device did Jared Fogle use to keep track of his exercise progresswhen he lost over 200 pounds on the Subway diet?

A pedometer

What do Santa and Jared from Subway have in common?

They both leave kids rooms with an empty sack

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How did Jared from Subway get food poisoning?

He ate a 5 year old weiner

What did Jared say when the girl asked him for a footlong?

That he only has a 6 inch.