What's the best part about being cremated?

Finally achieving a smokin' hot body.

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What's the best part of growing up in Compton?

No bad dad jokes.

What's the best part of having a kid?

The chewy center.

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What's the best part about being cremated?

Finally achieving a smokin' hot body.

Why was John Lennon so ashy?

Because he was cremated

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How do Communists achieve a revolution every single year?

They planet!

What do they tell Soviet children who want to achieve their dreams?

Shoot for the Tsars.